Predicting things
Oh my goodness, do you know how many places you can get a free daily horoscope on the internet? So many. I didn’t know because I had never looked until right now. Because I don’t go out of my way to read them.
I will, however, read them if I happen upon yesterday’s newspaper or a magazine from this time last year at the doctor’s office. Really it is only the out of date horoscopes I am interested in. I don’t like knowing or pretending to know the future. But I find it funny to look back and see if it was right.
You know the thing is they can always be right, right? If you read the one in yesterday’s paper. It’s now time for an embarrassing admission, you see. Please tell me that most of us have had moments in life where we needed to be a bit…creative…with employment. So one year when my Christmas job at the mall came to an end, I fell into something…interesting. I read tarot cards. Except I knew I was just spouting rubbish, because my entire training in tarot cards came from one paperback book bought from Spencer’s Gifts and repeatedly watching this episode of My So-Called Life on a worn-out copy-of-a-copy-of-a-copy video tape. Because of that, I prefaced every reading with a speech about everything being for entertainment and not to take any of it seriously and people seemed to get that, so that was how I paid for my books one semester. I had a sociology class that term with a completely inane self-published textbook and I was always half-tempted to tell the teacher how I had raised the ridiculous $75 for her mandatory stack of photocopies, but of course I never had nerve like that. The textbook was probably the worst I ever used, but that didn’t mean I wanted to risk not getting a good grade. Survival over humour, you see.
Click for print-sized card.
And seriously, I cannot tell you how many times I said that ‘one door closes; another door opens’ line during this particular stint of employment. It covers everything.
xlovesx
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